Advice Poll

Can someone please give me a simple way to say, "I'm not interested." I've been on several first dates now, and I have yet to master the art of "Thanks, but no thanks."

The first time around, I said yes to the second date before I realized that it might be unwise to date someone who within the first twenty minutes of meeting him confessed to having anger issues and a restraining order against him. When he followed up on my "yes.", I took the easy way out and sent him an email saying I didn't think I was "ready to date."

The second time around, I spent eight hours with the guy, enjoying the conversation and the company but had to admit that I just wasn't attracted to him. When he called to ask me out again, I tried to be honest and say that either I wasn't ready or he wasn't the right one. That obviously didn't work too well, becuase he conitnues to call and invite me to art shows and B-52 concerts.

Last Sunday, I went out with a guy who was just plain boring. Nice to look at, but boring. He texted me Tuesday morning, and I've yet to respond. I don't want to hurt his feelings.

Really, why is this so hard? I really have a hard time being honest if I think it might make someone feel bad. But, leaving them hanging is just plain rude and leading them on is worse.

So, here is my question foor you, the reader...

When someone contacts you following a 1st or 2nd date, and you know you're not interested, how do you respond AND how do you muster the courage to do it?